This is Brandon's locker.
Not anymore. They just assigned it to me.
But I could be Brandon if you want.
Morning, Andrea.
Brandon, what are you doing over here?
I heard locker values appreciate quicker on this side of the quad.
Oh, you mean you're ducking Emily.
I just don't wanna deal with it right now.
Brandon, avoidance is how you're dealing with it.
I don't know, I'm just not an in-your-face type of guy.
Hey, Bran, why don't you get that ugly mug out of my face?
Man, what did you have for breakfast, a Skunk McMuffin?
That's my fave.
- Good morning, campers. - Morning, ladies.
Before I sign off, remember:
Beverly High may trounce West Beverly High
at the annual homecoming game next week.
That doesn't mean we can't have the best floats in the parade.
So get out your chicken wire, your toilet paper,
and we'll see you at halftime.
Do we really have to enter this contest?
Yes. It'll be fun.
You guys, I'm not exactly a member of the pep club either,
but, you know, I really think we have a chance of winning.
- You think so? - Yeah.
So can we have the lumber delivered to your house?
- Wait a minute- - Hold on, Brandon.
You're the only family in Beverly Hills
that actually has tools in their tool shed.
Are Brenda and Dylan committed to this?
Brandon?
Yeah, actually, Brenda designed the float.
In that case, we'll be there. See you.
- See you, bro. - Later.
Andrea, you don't feel like editing the sports page today, do you?
It's not gonna get any easier unless you tell her the truth.
Yeah.
"And have you noticed that all the rich kids north of Sunset
have the biggest egos and the smallest brains?"
Oh, God, don't tell me.
Afraid so. Phantom pen pal strikes again.
What's this, the fourth letter we've gotten?
Are you kidding? This is like the seventh in the last two weeks.
I think we should give this guy his own column.
- You would, Griffin. - No, no, this is pure social satire.
"Wouldn't it be hysterical to see
what your basic West Beverly princesses would do
if somebody slashed their BMW convertibles to shreds?"
This guy's twisted.
Really, this is not my idea of satire.
Come on, people, we got a paper to put out. Let's do it.
- Brandon? - Yeah?
Why'd you move your locker?
- You wanna know the real reason? - Yeah.
Well, I was just spending so much time here,
I figured it would be more convenient.
Excuse me.
Brandon, how about going out tonight?
I can't, Emily.
Come on, it's been two weeks since we've been together.
No, I really can't. I have to study tonight.
Well, how about I come over and we can study together?
I really don't think we'd get much studying done that way.
- Listen, I gotta go. - Brandon, aren't we ever gonna-?
Okay.
You have to study. I understand.
I'll see you later.
Dylan, time-out.
Okay, coach, I'll sit the bench for a while.
- Time-out's over. - No, Dylan, Dylan, come on.
We're supposed to be studying history, not sex education.
I'm sorry. There's just something about this Louisiana Purchase.
You know, it drives me wild.
Dylan, I'm serious. We should be doing more than this.
You know, I think so too. Let's go upstairs.
No.
Look, I mean more than making out all the time.
And not that I don't like it, because I do.
I like it a lot.
It's just that it's practically all we ever do anymore.
Oh, that's not true. I mean, last weekend, we went to a movie.
Yeah, and we barely saw any of it.
Well, that's not my fault.
I mean, I wasn't exactly kissing myself, you know.
Look, all I'm saying is we should make a little extra effort
to do something interesting, cultural.
So we won't feel guilty when we're making out all the time.
Exactly.
Hello.
Hello?
Yeah?
Great.
I hope you're having a good time. I'm about to call the phone company.
They're gonna track you down, you got that?
Yeah, I got it. And you gotta get out of the house a little more, Walsh.
- Steve? - Yeah, hey, what's going on, Walsh?
You got yourself a heavy breather?
No, hang-ups.
Why don't you come to the Peach Pit? You won't worry about it here.
No. I'm studying, man.
Studying? It's Friday night. That's immoral.
Well, I already put in a 30-hour work week behind the counter.
Why don't you come, be a customer? See how the other half lives.
Forget it. I'm not gonna bring you any hot sauce. You know where it is.
Nat, show this young man respect. He's a paying customer.
No, he's not. He's part of the family. And it's on the house.
Both of you.
- Oh, well, thanks, Gramps. - Thanks.
I've gotta eat with you more often.
Anyway, listen, if she's not getting the message,
you just have to be firm, spell it out.
Tell her adios, sayonara, au revoir, finito.
The United Nations approach.
Tell her it doesn't work, and then it's over. Period.
Easy to say, hard to do.
Easy to do. Look who just walked in.
Oh, God. I told her I was studying.
Be firm.
Hey, what a coincidence. I thought you were committed to the books tonight.
Yeah, just taking a little break.
My parents are out of town for the weekend and I'm here for dinner.
Mind if I join you?
Well, why don't you take my seat? I gotta make a few phone calls.
- Thanks, Steve. - Sure.
It's so weird. I was just thinking about you and here you are.
- Yeah. - That's called kismet, you know.
When two lovers are destined to be together forever-
Look, Emily, I don't know how else to say this, except just say it,
so I hope you understand.
- Brandon- - But I don't think
we should see each other anymore.
Look, I know you're really mad about that drug thing, and I can't blame you.
No, I'm not mad.
Well, you should be.
Because it was the stupidest thing I ever did in my life,
and I am so incredibly sorry.
I love you. You know that, don't you?
You know that I'd never do anything to hurt you.
Yeah, I know, but I have to go with what I feel.
Brandon, please.
Why can't you find it in your heart to forgive me?
Why can't you give me a second chance?
Please, I'll do anything. Anything.
Just give me a second chance.
I wish it was that simple. I really do.
But that doesn't mean we can't be friends.
Good friends.
Maybe if you just- We cool out for a couple of weeks
and you have time to think before you make a final decision.
Emily, it's all I have been thinking about for the last two weeks.
And I'm really sorry, but it's just the way it's gotta be.
If I had a fairy godmother and she could grant me one wish,
it would be to turn back the clock and start over.
Yeah, I know how you feel.
Do you?
Good night, Emily.
Oh, my God. Brandon, look.
Isn't this a perfect way to end a perfectly marvellous week?
Any way to salvage it?
I'm afraid it's a goner.
Probably the same guy that wants to slash the BMWs.
I wouldn't worry about it, Emily.
You're not exactly a West Beverly princess.
Why didn't he just slash my throat while he was at it?
Hey.
It'll be okay. Don't worry, I'll take care of it.
Don't worry.
Well, here are some towels, and that's just about it.
Thanks, Mrs. Walsh.
But you and Brandon didn't have to go to all this trouble.
Oh, it's no trouble. It's our pleasure.
You get some rest. You'll feel better in the morning.
Thanks.
And if you need anything, feel free to call the concierge.
You know, even the Holiday Inn gets a little warning
before a guest checks in.
What was I supposed to do, Brenda?
Oh, let's see, drop her off at her house?
Her parents are out of town.
Poor baby. Afraid of the dark?
Come on, Brenda, getting your tyre slashed is a very creepy thing.
Anyway, it's like Mom says:
If we can't show compassion for people in trouble,
why are we put on earth?
Yeah, well, Mom didn't see you as high as a kite
on the Euphoria Emily slipped into your drink.
Do you have to bring that up every time?
- Yes, because I don't trust her. - Brenda-
And I don't like the way she's taking advantage of you.
- Are you finished? - Yes, I am.
Hold on, I wanna say something.
You and Dylan are the only two people who know
that she spiked my drink at the club.
I'd like to keep it that way.
Brandon, why are you so into protecting her?
I don't wanna see her become the outcast
just because I break up with her.
She's not a bad person. She's really not.
Fine.
Is the concierge open for business?
Emily.
Hi.
No, Emily. We're not doing this. You better go.
- Brandon. - What do you want?
Want to be with me tonight then have me break up with you tomorrow?
Is that what you want?
If we make love right now,
I promise you won't wanna break up with me.
Emily, to make love, I have to be in love.
Okay.
I'll leave.
But remember, Brandon.
I love you.
Oh, no, not at all. She's safe and sound.
Yes, Emily spent the night here.
It's no problem at all.
Well, we felt with her tyre being slashed-
Thank you, Mrs. Walsh. I'll talk to her.
- Of course. - Hi.
Didn't you get the message?
No, my tyre was slashed.
Well, Brandon drove me.
No, Mom, I slept in Brenda's room.
His sister.
Yeah, it was fine. Don't worry.
I'll be home soon.
Okay, love you. Bye-bye.
Is everything all right?
Yeah, sure. They just got home early.
Steve, you're doing a great job,
but do you think you could look a little more carpenteresque?
Silver, I'm warning you. Off with the video. Now.
- It's important to record this. - But why?
Because some West Beverly floats have been accused
of being built by professionals.
Well, this tape will put that notion to rest.
Hi, guys. Sorry I'm late.
What's with the outfit, Donna?
Oh, well, Andrea said carpentry.
All right, Donna, you can help me paint.
Paint?
I'm not getting paint on these clothes.
- I can't believe she's wearing that. - What?
That's Brandon's prized shirt from the '87 Series.
I mean, he's gonna go ballistic.
Talk about a fashion statement.
- Hey, everybody. - Hi.
Yo, Dylan, we should probably power-sand those boards
before we put them in place.
Cute shirt.
I spent last night here with Brandon, I had nothing to wear this morning.
Pardon me?
Brandon invited me to stay over last night, and things got a little...
Well, you know.
He's something special.
I gotta check the paint.
- I thought you blew her off. - Yeah, well, she blew back in.
- You didn't-? - I didn't lay a hand on her.
I can't believe you'd let someone actually touch
the 1987 World Championship shirt.
She won't leave me alone, man, and she won't take a hint.
I've broken up with her in clear and certain terms.
Yeah, well, obviously not clear enough.
What am I supposed to do, be brutal? That's not me, man.
No, you're still trying to be Brandon Walsh,
the all-American nice guy, right?
What can I say?
You're afraid of what would happen to her if you dumped her.
I guess.
Man, I'm afraid of all the things that could happen to you if you don't.
Boy...
Come on, you two, pitch in. I wanna see you sweat.
- Oh, forget it. - No way!
Yeah, well, I wanna see you sweat.
Dylan, not now. My parents are right over there.
Okay. I'll have to wait till I get you alone at the concert.
- Dylan, come on, you promised. - I was just kidding.
You're avoiding me.
You know, Emily, between me and Brenda,
we must have four dozen T-shirts and sweatshirts.
Why did you have to choose my favourite one?
Makes me feel closer to you.
- I won't do anything to it. - Except get paint all over it.
- Little club soda, it will come right out. - Just forget it, okay?
- No big deal. I'll take it off. - Emily, what is it with you?
Are you just trying to be funny, or are you trying to drive me crazy?
Well, we're off to a promising start.
It's so...
Romantic?
I feel so sorry for the people sitting behind us.
They must've thought we were so immature.
We couldn't go 20 minutes without pawing each other.
You guys? Never.
You know, the funny thing is that we actually liked the music.
Maybe that was our problem, we liked it too much.
I don't think that was the problem, Bren.
Anyway, we're gonna give it another chance next week,
sort of increase our tolerance level.
Sort of like holding your breath under water.
No.
Brandon.
- Hi. - Hi.
I need to talk to you.
I'm sorry about your shirt.
And I'm really sorry about that crazy stunt
of sneaking into your bedroom the other night.
And I want you to know, if you never spoke to me again,
I'd understand.
Yeah, we'll speak again, Emily.
Hell, we work on the same newspaper, right?
Well, I just want you to know that I'm ready to deal with the situation.
I fell for you hard.
But if it's not gonna work out, it's not gonna work out, and that's cool.
Friends?
The phantom pen pal strikes again.
Listen, Geraldo, Andrea's worked hard to keep gossip out of the paper.
I don't think now is the time to start putting it in.
This ain't gossip, Brandon. This one is psycho time.
"And it will be my pleasure to throw gasoline on the fire
that burns this school to the ground. "
And he expects us to print this?
That's what he's demanding, but we're not gonna give a nut case a forum.
- Hey, like it or not, baby, this is news. - I'm sorry.
There is nothing newsworthy about hate mail. Listen to how he ends this.
"And if some of the little bitches get caught in the flames,
toss me another marshmallow. "
I think we ought to take it to the police.
Hang on a sec. Let me turn this thing off.
Hi, sorry about that.
Hello?
Come on, Dad, what's up? The suspense is killing us.
Wait, wait just a second. Listen to this.
Hi. It's me, Brandon.
I was just thinking of you.
It's Emily.
Your baby blues and that totally disarming smile
that fills any rainy day I have with sunshine.
I miss you, Brandon. I miss being next to you.
The feel of your arms wrapped around me,
the touch of your skin, the way you caress my body-
- I think we get the picture, Dad. - Are you sure?
There's 12 more just like it if you wanna listen to them.
No, thank you, Dad.
So, what the hell is going on here, Brandon?
Hello. Hello, Emily? I'm getting sick of this.
We don't know that was her.
Oh, come on, Mom, it's pretty obvious.
And it's obvious she wanted me and your mother to hear those messages,
which I don't think is the sign of a balanced person.
Well, she's been pretty upset ever since we broke up,
but I talked to her at school today
and she acted like everything was okay.
The key word being "acted. "
Well, now, let's not be too harsh.
I mean, Brenda, remember a few months ago with Dylan?
You said it yourself. I mean, breaking up is hard to do.
- Honey... - Mom, that was completely different.
Emily Valentine has stepped way over the line.
I mean, this isn't about a broken heart. This is about a fatal attraction.
And how did Michael Douglas handle it?
Not well.
Hello. Hello?
- Ready? - Ready, set, go.
Well, you have plenty of energy this morning.
Well, I got plenty of sleep last night.
Yeah, no phone calls. I guess your crank caller finally gave up.
Or got put out of business.
You know, Brandon, beating Emily at her own game for one night is fine,
but you can't go through your life with your phone off the hook.
I just don't know what to do anymore.
Want me to talk to her? I'll tell her the score.
Forget it. The way you feel now, you'd bite her head off.
Well, that would be an improvement.
Look, obviously, the girl's kind of messed up.
Kind of?
Give me a break. I mean, she's bothered in the extreme.
The way she sounded on the answering machine,
I wouldn't be surprised if she was a hard-core stoner.
Brenda, you don't know that about her.
You don't know anything about her.
Yeah, well, neither do you.
Have you been inside her house, Brandon?
Have you met her parents?
Do you know any of her friends from her old school?
Face it, Brandon. Nobody knows who this girl is.
What's this?
Oh, I don't know, it's a little too early for Christmas.
It has your name on it.
It's been cleaned and ironed.
Boy, she washes, irons and cooks.
Homemade cake with a note. "Sorry to you and your family. Emily. "
Maybe we were a little off on the fatal-attraction theory.
No, Brandon, we're dead on it and deep in it.
- Oh, looks good. - Brandon, don't eat that.
Look, this whole thing could be dosed with Euphoria or worse.
I repeat, you don't know who this girl is.
Morning.
Hey, what's that?
- A folding Corona. - God, it's beautiful.
Yeah, it's a work of art.
My dad gave it to me when I was 10.
All the great old reporters used to travel with these.
This has probably seen wars,
maybe even typed a novel in Paris, who knows?
You can feel the keys. It's got a real strength, this machine.
I love it.
I'm glad you like it. I'm giving it to the paper.
I can't accept this.
You really care about your work.
I know you'll respect it and take care of it.
So let's just call it a parting gift
and thanks for your letting me write for you.
Wait a minute. Are you going somewhere?
Yeah, I'm quitting the paper.
- You're joking. - No, it's for the best.
Let's face it. I really blew it with Brandon.
And for his sake, I shouldn't be where I'm not wanted.
Emily, your writing's getting really good.
And if you wanna stay, it's okay with me.
Thanks.
I'll see you at the inauguration.
- Where? - You know, when we finish the float.
I don't know.
Hey, you helped build it.
I'm really not in a big rush to be where I'm not wanted.
Look, you belong in that picture.
Are you sure?
Absolutely.
Thanks, Andrea.
He's taking you where?
Out for an evening of Paganini.
Oh, their pasta is supposed to be excellent.
Donna, Paganini is a composer.
He wrote all this wild stuff for the violin.
And you guys like that kind of music?
Don't you know?
Brenda and Dylan go to concerts so they can make out to music.
Not.
Look, in addition to listening to some very interesting music,
we are also showing that we are mature enough
to restrain ourselves in public.
Speaking of restraint.
I would really just like to bust that girl's chops sometimes.
What is your problem with her?
Yeah. I mean, she's always nice to me.
Look, I really don't wanna get into it. Just trust me.
She's doing a major obsession job on Brandon.
- I used to do that all the time. - Kelly, not like this.
In eighth grade, I sent Ronnie Lightstone perfumed love letters
and called him ten times a day.
And what happened?
Well, his mother paid a visit to my mother
and I got grounded, lost my phone privileges,
and learned the gentle art of subtlety.
Yeah, well, Emily Valentine
has stepped way over the line of being subtle.
Don't forget. Andrea wants us to take a picture in front of the float
- for the paper. - I'm there.
- Me three. - Right. Bye.
- See you. - Bye.
All right, you guys, hoist it up there.
- Here we go, Steve. - Right there.
- There. - All right.
Check it out.
Check that out.
- Looks terrific, Brandon. - Thanks.
- Why'd you have to bring her? - Come on, Brandon.
She worked as hard as everybody else. I couldn't leave her out.
Guys, she's ready to go. Let's roll.
All right, let's get in place for the picture.
I'm gonna start the timer. Everyone ready?
Ten, nine, eight,
seven, six, five,
four, three-
Damn it, Emily, enough!
Don't touch me. Don't call me. Don't leave cakes on my doorstep.
Don't manipulate so you wind up in my bedroom.
And don't lie to my friends about some night of passion that never happened.
- Brandon. - No. I'm sorry.
I tried to do this the nice way, but you won't take a hint.
I can't help it. I love you.
- Emily, listen to me- - No, no. You listen to me.
When I first moved to L.A., guys were hitting on me,
and I had my pick.
But then I went out with you.
I thought you were different.
I thought you were special. I thought what we had was special.
That's why I wanted my first time to be with you.
So my first time would be something I'd always wanna remember.
You gave me something to remember, all right.
When I first moved here, everyone thought I was a slut.
Brandon, you've managed to make me feel like one.
Thanks for the memories.
Brandon, let her go.
Brandon Walsh sure knows how to dump a girl.
I've never seen anybody so smooth.
What was I supposed to do? She wouldn't leave me alone.
- Well, maybe now she will. - It's not that I don't like her.
It's just the minute I tried to cool things off, she went ballistic.
- What did you say to her? - Basically, he told her to drop dead.
- Brandon. - I did not. I just put my foot down.
- It was out of control. - Well, I feel bad for her.
I mean, at that age, overwhelmed by emotions,
you don't always act rationally.
I'm sure she's ashamed of herself.
And I just hope that whatever you said, you didn't say it in front of anybody.
I'll get it.
Hello?
Well, whatever you said didn't cure her phone habit.
That's it. I'm calling the phone company.
No, no, no, let me handle this.
How you doing? This is Sal's Pizzeria.
We got them large, small, plain,
and your choice of 14 delicious toppings just for you.
Hello?
Well, I got her.
Look, making fun of Emily is not the way to deal with this.
We should just call her parents.
I'll get it.
Come on, ring. I'm just getting warmed up.
Andrea, what are you doing here?
Shouldn't you be putting the paper to sleep?
To bed, Steve. To bed.
Brandon, you know those bizarre letters we were getting at the paper?
Yeah?
Well, we got another one, and it's worse than the last.
- So? - So I'm no Columbo,
but all those letters were written on Emily's typewriter.
Let me look at that.
West Beverly, heed my cry Abusers of love deserve to die
Smug and secure In their well-mannered house
They won't have long I'm as quiet as a mouse
And a poet, on top of everything else.
Don't you see, she wanted me to discover these.
These letters, they're a cry for help.
A cry for help and a pretty obvious threat.
I hope tonight's concert is a little livelier than last week's.
Don't worry. We will not be bored.
Oh, yeah, since when did you become such an expert?
Hey, I'm just into passion, wherever I can find it.
Hey, hey.
Behave yourself.
I don't get it. One minute, she's this nice, sweet girl,
and the next minute, she's writing these weird letters.
I don't know, I think Emily has what is called a borderline-type personality.
Andrea, she's nuts.
Something causes that, Steve. I mean, think about it.
She's moved from high school to high school.
She probably has deep-rooted dependency needs.
I mean, she's looking for something more stable, something permanent
to latch onto.
- Me? - Well, it's like I said, she's nuts.
Well, her parents aren't listed.
Sure you don't have any other number?
- Just the one she gave me. - It's probably her private line.
Well, it's off the hook. Brandon, give us her address.
I wanna go there and have a talk with her parents.
- Dad, I really don't think that- - Brandon, it's gone far enough.
Parent to parent is really the best way to deal with this.
Dylan, look.
- Emily, what are you doing? - Brenda, wait.
It's covered in gasoline.
Emily, come on. Let's talk about this.
Hey, this is dangerous.
What is there to talk about? I know you hate me, Brenda.
You've hated me since the first day I started school here.
- Emily, I don't hate you. - Don't lie to me, Brenda. Not now.
Hey, Bren, wait a minute, she is whacked.
Dylan, she's talking to me. I have to listen.
You've never forgiven me for going out with him.
And you resent the fact that Brandon liked me.
- Emily, that's not true. - Don't lie to me, Brenda.
Do you think I'm fooling around here?
Do you think I'm interested in your two-faced talk?
You turned everyone against me
after I worked so hard to become part of your precious little group.
I don't wanna be a part of anything anymore.
Emily, don't talk like that. You are a part of our group.
Are you kidding?
After the way Brandon dumped me? Humiliated me in front of everyone?
Why doesn't your brother like me, Brenda? What did I do?
Emily, Brandon's a trusting person.
And you betrayed his trust.
It's gonna take time to get that back.
He won't. He won't ever forgive me.
Yes, he will.
I swear to you, he will.
Look, if you want Brandon to give you a chance,
you have to give him a chance.
I know my brother.
Believe me, he has his faults.
But probably one of the greatest things about him
is his amazing ability to forgive.
And if you want him to forgive you, Emily,
you have to give him his space.
And I swear to you, he will.
I'm sorry, Brenda.
- I'm sorry. - It's okay.
Emily.
Emily, what's going on?
I'm sorry, Brandon.
Sorry for everything.
I'm sorry for the phone calls,
for making up that story about my tyres being slashed
so I could spend the night with you.
For those disgusting letters I didn't mean.
But most of all, I'm sorry for slipping you the Euphoria.
I don't expect you to ever wanna forgive me
or even talk to me again.
I guess when I lost you, I went crazy.
I thought I hated you.
I thought I hated all of you.
But the person I hate most of all right now is myself.
Emily, you need to get some help.
Has anything like this ever happened before?
A year ago, we moved,
and I locked myself in my room for three days,
and played loud music and screamed.
But moving to Beverly Hills was a whole new kind of pressure.
This place is tough.
You all made it easier.
But I gotta admit, I do need some help.
I really need some help.
- Bren, you asleep? - No.
What did Emily's parents say when you dropped her off?
Well, they couldn't say enough.
They wanted to talk to me, to Mom, Dad.
Her mom told me she's been seeing a psychiatrist on and off for years.
Brandon, what do you think is wrong with her?
I don't know.
It's like she's incredibly lonely.
And at the same time, she can't deal with the idea of being close to anyone.
I don't know. I'm not a shrink.
No, you're definitely not.
She told me what happened out there.
What'd you say to get her to come down off the float?
I told her that she would always have two friends in Beverly Hills.
Good night, Bren.
Good night, Brandon.